The LOVE which i have flown all over the world to sit at various teacher’s/guru’s feet is available right here – in everyone I meet, in my children, husband, students…. the distinction between human and spiritual is falling away…..
This is a note to my Self from my Self.
Yes to BEING HUMAN! Ever thought about the words ‘Human Being’ ? Who picked the word ‘being’ to go after ‘human’ ? I think they were smarter than most notice. How about meditate on the words ‘human BEING’ instead of a some sanskrit mantra some teacher thinks is going to give you salvation. Is it possible that the answer could be truly SIMPLE and already right here in our human-ness? DO we have to go to India (which i have done 3 times) on a spiritual quest, get sick, recite mantra, practice meditation, pranayam , asanas, rituals etc for year s on end… ultimately loosing site of the original goal….. just continuing to slave away at what i think or believe is important…….
How about starting where YOU ARE rather than for years trying to ‘get somewhere’, or be something else – that someone has told you you should strive for…. or fit a mold you read about in a so called spiritual book…or believe they all are smarter, know what is best, are holier and more pure and worthy than you and follow and imitate them as if you are a frigging grovelling idiot ?
I think i began treading the so called spiritual path due to not wanting to feel the pain that was threatening to explode inside…. I suppose there were other reasons.. but avoiding life i now realize was a big part of my ‘so called spiritual life’. You might think i sound kind of cynical or something… but it is more that i just don’t buy it all anymore….
I used to divide my life into – this is spiritual – that is not…. seems like…. I’m discovering what it is to BE in this human form….. if that makes any sense…. a big huge laugh…….Ok…. more is falling away and opening up.
It seems that as the fear drops away to simply feel and notice all that I’ve feared, love and compassion appears. Being spiritual is not separate from being human anymore….. meditating because I was trying to not feel the pain inside or because i was escaping into a trance state to help me not feel what is here is not the answer for me anymore. I know it is believed to be the answer for many, but I am discovering that the more human i allow myself to be, the more I drop into all that is feared, the more love appears.
In trying to be spiritual – I discounted or ignored what was truly here. Only for my whole life. What a hoot to discover. What a relief…. the jewel really always was here, is here…..
A tender flower delicately blooming, spreading open its petals… completely…simply…. expanding – discovering Love….Space Simply Being Human.
New eyes opening.