Yoga because i simply enjoy it!

For 30 years I’ve been waking up with the thought I should meditate and do asanas(postures). That is alot of stress to have that for so long every single morning all these years. I had periods when I would get up at 4am, 5am, 6am and do many hours – to now…. I would say my formal practice has been non-existent this past couple of summer months. I just realized yesterday that it has been 30 years! What about waking up and not having that ‘should’ present anywhere in my mind whether conscious or unconscious?

I’ve been feeling inner division alot…. the old part thinks i should be doing yoga whether it it meditating or asanas, the fresh part that has accomplished sooo much in the relative world these past few months, is relaxed and enjoying life in whatever I am doing. I have wondered if there is something wrong with me because I am not meditating, am I afraid of something, is there somewhere inside sabatoging the Truth here?

Today I am noticing that because I’ve seen the absolute impossibility of any yoga practice bringing one to true ‘awakening’ or enlightenment, then why do it is one thought thread I’ve had inside this summer since going to a 5 day silent retreat in June with Adyashanti. The absolute hopelessness, complete impossibility and the deep utter failure of the so called ‘you’ ,,,,, ‘attaining anything’ in the spiritual realm.

It is all a set-up for failiure. I’m not talking about gaining experiences that come and go.

How about practicing yoga not for any goal in the future? How about practicing yoga because something here simply enjoys it!!!! How about simply for the love of IT!

Yahoo! What freedom… I can’t even describe it! Or I could say that maybe it feels like a kid jumping off our tower into the pond.

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One Response to “Yoga because i simply enjoy it!”

  1. Meredith Says:

    Only reading this a month after you posted. We definitely all need to get read of the “shoulds” in our lives–for me it is tied up with the Protestant guilt that is prevalent in my family and our society. I am working hard to release those “shoulds.” However, that means that sometimes the house isn’t terribly clean 😐
    As you know, a lot of the participants in your yoga classes are not really there for the spiritual aspect. I certainly only started yoga classes (before I met you) as many recommended it for stress relief. I am still trying to understand and encompass the spiritual angle. But hey, it feels so good! And if it feels good for my body, it must feel good for my spirit too 😀


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